What if there was a make-up company who said you don’t need make up?
What if they told young women that looking your best has little to do with how much goo or powder you put on your face, but with cultivating poise and spirit?
What if they challenged women to find creative ways to get possitive attention from men (or boys) other than putting a mask of make-up on every day?
Would they make any money?
And how would they sell a product to women when they’re saying women don’t need the product?
I’m not sure, but my intuition tells me a company like this could be very successful.
Mark McGuinness puts it this way:
Ralph Waldo Emerson said “A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds”. I’d like to put forth for your consideration that foolish productivity is the hobgoblin of creative minds (link).
Is my blog, my consistent (at least until this week) tidy little blog a “hobgoblin?”
Do I have a purpose for writing this blog?
Is it meeting it’s purpose?
This is a guest post written by my good friend, Josh Holm, encouraging us to cling to hope rather than material wealth. It’s a little long for a blog post, but I think you’ll be empowered if you make it through. Thanks Josh!
Seduction
As I was watching television earlier tonight, I was struck by how many commercials there were advertising products in such a way as to make me feel that I would be fulfilled by them. If only I would buy a Mercedes, beautiful people would gravitate toward me, traffic would part for me to pass through, and the sun would shine on me for the rest of my life. If only I would hang a Plasma TV on my wall, my life would drift into a blissful peace.
Yet, I’m sure that once the flash and hype TV and the Mercedes were gone, I would be in the same place I was before, unsatisfied. Only a little (okay a lot) more money would be drained from the bank account.
Everything we see around us screams “eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die.” How do you hold on to your hope in Christ in a culture like this?
I admit that I am, sometimes very willingly, seduced into purchasing things that I don’t really need. Last year I bought a kayak because I swore it would help me exercise more. It’s sitting in my carport right now collecting dust. I thought exercise would make me feel better about myself, but now the blue kayak sits as another reminder of my unfulfillment.
This seduction travels beyond products and into lifestyles. It is easy to be seduced into a lifestyle of pursuing pleasure and wealth, a lifestyle that promotes yourself instead of others.
This is where I have been living in the past year. Right out of college I was hired on full-time at a software company for a very nice salary. Over the course of the year, I hoarded almost all of that money, giving very little to the church and very little of it to any other charitable organization. Once you start pursuing this kind of lifestyle, it becomes like a wildfire, consuming all that is truly good and satisfying in your life. [Josh, is this backed up by your reasoning. It's a little hyperbolic.]
Have Hope
I believe that we can have hope in America, though. In fact, there is a Juniper tree-juniperus chinensis, just so you know-in Arizona that gives me hope. Sometime long-ago, a fire burned a hole in this evergreen so big that a grown man can walk through it! Upon first glance through the charred, blackened hole through the middle of its prickly bark-protected trunk, you would swear that the tree had photosynthesized its last light particle. Give this conifer a second glance, however, and you will see growth sprouting from its top boughs, glowing a bright green against the magnificent sapphire of the sky! The tree has survived its trial-by-fire and lives, even with its serious scars.
A worldly wildfire has been ravaging my life through the lifestyle I have been living. This fire leaves me unsatisfied and unfulfilled once all of the shine, excitement, and noise have burned into nothingness. But I know that there is hope of fulfillment and redemption in Jesus Christ our Lord. He has promised good things to those that follow and seek Him.
Let’s walk away from this unfulfilling, materialistic lifestyle by committing anew to following Christ. Take courage from the prophet Jeremiah:
“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”
-Jeremiah 29:13-14
And probably not tomorrow. Maybe not for a week.
If you want to know why, email me. Link to contact form’s up above.
Plenty of good posts below though. Have a good day!
A few weeks ago, I talked about 5 steps to dealing with highly narcissistic people (see that post here). Unfortunately I have a friend still dealing with a person like this, and she’s run out of patience. So today, let’s revisit the subject.
How Narcissists Replace Facts With Spin
My friend, we’ll call her Laverne, has an unpaid internship with a narcissist, whom we will refer to as Narcy (like Marcy but with an N). Recently Narcy asked Laverne to meet to talk about things Laverne needed to do.
When Laverne told her she had plans and asked to reschedule, Narcy told her she was being flaky and not pulling her weight. However, Narcy, like a true narcissist, effortlessly replaces important facts, facts like:
- Laverne (the intern) had to take charge of productivity when Narcy (the boss) wasn’t doing it, giving Narcy a long to do list to get through before it would be productive to meet again.
- Narcy had not completed any of them.
- Narcy does not know how to use tools like her computer (she didn’t know her own username and password to her website), and is unwilling to learn.
- Instead, she expects Laverne to do the work for her,
- And is unwilling to compensate her (read, unpaid internship).
How do you maintain your boundaries with a person like this without being rude?
How To Maintain Your Boundaries
A pleaser would grovel and apologize to Narcy, then do the work they weren’t getting paid for, or if they were really mad, they’d complain to all their friends and stop taking Narcy’s phone calls.
Someone more agressive might respond by cussing Narcy out over the phone.
But we’re dealing with an irrational narcissist here, and we have to use different social tools. Remember, like I said before the best advice is to quit. Laverne is not being paid, and she’s not learning anything. It’s not worth the hassle.
However, if Laverne sees some kind of light at the end of the tunnel and wants to stick around, here’s what I would say to Narcy the narcissist.
“I’m sorry you feel that way Narcy. If I’ve given you the impression I don’t want to learn from you, I apologize. I’m trying, but things are just intense right now. I just really need you to help me. Remember that list I gave you? You would be the coolest person in the world, my hero, if you did all those things. Then, after that, maybe I would be able to get together. I’m really sorry Narcy. Can you help me?”
Kissing Ass = Success With A Narcissist
A normal person probably wouldn’t want to say this, and the thing is you wouldn’t want to say this to a normal person. It’s definitely a shot to the ego. However, narcissists are not normal, and it will work because it appeals to the narcissist’s need to be the star.
In the end, if you’re not willing to grovel like this, then the job is obviously not worth the effort. You should just quit. It’s your pride and your need to be right or your job. Something’s gotta give.
“It’s a marathon, not a sprint,” Mark the RD said,
and as he was talking, I was reminded of a story.
The most important lesson to learn about fulfilling your calling = JOG
This past summer, every Sunday I was running around at 1 o’clock to play Ultimate Frisbee. My feet would be bare, and I would always forget my sunscreen so often, a few days later, my nose would be peeling. It was worth it though
On this particular day, as usual about half way through I was exhausted. The sun was hot, and I’ve never been much of a runner.
I played volleyball in high school. Put me in the endzone, throw a loft to jump for, and I’ll probably come down with it, but running for 2 hours straight is not my specialty.
Today, my team had just dropped the Frisbee. The other team was making a fast break down the field. The guy I was guarding broke for the endzone. I needed to make a defensive stop or risk the other team getting a score, but let me tell you, I wasn’t thinking something confident like, “I’m going to slap that Frisbee down!”
No, what was going through my mind was, “How am I ever going to run that far?” I realized there was no way I could get down to the field in time to make a play. The best I could do was jog down there and hope for the best. So I jogged. The guy I was guarding must have been pretty tired too because by the time we made it to the endzone there were only a couple arms lengths between us.
The guy throwing the disc saw my mark and thought he was going to make an easy score. He tossed it right to him. Unfortunately for him, I was only a few feet behind, and what did I do? I slapped that Frisbee down!
Then, I threw the disc to start the counter-attack and we ending up scoring!
It’s a marathan not a sprint. It’s better to jog for the whole game than sprint the first half and walk the second.
What does this mean for you and your calling?
Right now I have ton of work on my plate, and I just don’t have the time I want for the things most directly related to my calling. My problem is sometimes I decide not work on it at all unless I can get a solid 3 or 4 hours on it.
But wouldn’t it be better to devote 30 minutes a day. Then if I have more time, I can work on it more. If it’s 3 hours or nothing, it might never get done.
There’s your tip of the day from Joe: work on what you feel passionate about and called to as much as you can in one day, even if that is just 30 minutes. Spreading the work out like this might not seem as fulfilling now, but you will end up feeling better about yourself and your work.
And remember, life is a marathon, not a sprint.
I am an idea person. I get so much energy from coming up with great new ideas, especially when they just hit like lightening rather than when I’m sitting at my computer, struggling to think up creative thoughts. That is like coaxing a cat into a bath.
It is interesting how mundane activities can make room in our brains for great ideas. Today, I was stuffing envelopes for a marketing mailing and listening to classical music. I started having all these great ideas! I got out my planner and to do list and just started writing them all down for later.
In the same way, creative people talk about all the great ideas they have in the shower or while driving. They are always mad they don’t have a waterproof notebook to write them down. There is a general rule here that doing mundane physical tasks opens the mind to creativity.
What about you though? I am an idea person, but you might not be. Do you know where and how you get the most out of your gifts? Pretend for a second our bodies and minds are like plants. Do you know what requirements your plant has to have for it to grow the most?
