Joe Bunting

The Palm Tree With Pinecones

You didn’t know that was possible, did you?

Well believe it.

The Palm Tree with Pinecones

Encouraging Words from an Olympic Coach

The United States women gymnasts were fantastic last night.  They went head to head with the Chinese and found themselves equal or superior in every way, even with China’s more difficult—and therefore more rewarding—program.  When the Chinese started to boffle on the balance beam, the US found themselves looking at an opening to gold.

Unfortunately, they couldn’t go through it.  Nerves and pressure got in the way, and Alicia Sacramone, the team leader and oldest American gymnasts, fell twice.  Nastia Liukin and Shawn Johnson both stepped out on their floor excercises.  The United States lost by 2.375 points. 

The team huddled at the end, their coach, Márta Károlyi, spoke encouraging words in her thick Hungarian accent.  I couldn’t hear what she was saying, but I imagined her saying something wise and folky and soothing.

“We made some mistakes today.  No one will deny that, but what would man be if we didn’t make mistakes.  I am most proud of this team, not because you trampled the competition, but because you were beautiful today.  You were inspirational, darlings, graceful, both in your great success and in your small failures.  Now, go be graceful in defeat.”

They were.  It was a beautiful sight to watch the USA and Chinese athletes and coaches embrace after the competition, watching the Chinese coach take the remarkable Shawn Johnson’s face in his hands.  You were amazing team USA.  Thank you.

Vulnerability

Men have been accused of an unwillingness to be vulnerable for years, but with a word like vulnerable, who could blame them.  Here’s the dictionary definition of vulnerable:

1. capable of or susceptible to being wounded or hurt, as by a weapon: a vulnerable part of the body.
2. open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc.: an argument vulnerable to refutation; He is vulnerable to bribery.
3. (of a place) open to assault; difficult to defend: a vulnerable bridge.

Thanks dictionary.com!

Why am I thinking about vulnerability

I’m thinking about vulnerability because of Bobby. In my Crash and Burn synopsis which I posted the last couple of days I’ve been exploring Bobby’s character and his story, how he goes from a super dork to a stud.  I didn’t have it before.  I still don’t.  I’m getting there though.

There are three areas that require confidence in the realm of dating for men:

1. Pursuing
2. Vulnerability
3. Self-knowledge

There might be more, but these are huge elements of successful dating.  Bobby is horrible in all of them, and he needs practice and a good coach if he is going to become successful with girls.  So right now I’m brainstorming vulnerability. 

Vulnerability = Trust

Whoever decided vulnerability was a good word to use for relationships is an idiot.  Why would anyone want to become “susceptible to being wounded… as by a weapon?”  It’s no wonder men run for the hills at the word vulnerable.  To our battle forged brains it sounds like it should be in a war movie.  “Major, the bunker on the North East side is vulnerable to attack.  We need to send reinforcements to defend it immediately.”

What happens when we replace vulnerable with trust though.  Trust in the dictionary:

1. reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing;
2. confidence, a person on whom, or thing on which one relies.

From that definition, I imagine two castles right next to each other.  First they were totally separate, but then they become allies and eventually decide to join their walls to better protect one another. Together they are much stronger than they were as individual castles.

It also makes them vulnerable to eachother.  Each side knows where each other’s weakest points are, and there are no walls to keep the other side out, only walls to keep them in.  It could be very uncomfortable if things went sour. 

If the relationship is stable though, the alliance will result in a formidable defense with both sides knowing and protecting their weakest points from a harsh and dangerous world. 

The goal is trust, vulnerability is just the side effect.  Now, I’ve got to figure out how to make Bobby trust people.

How to Play

Are you very good at playing? I’m not. I am more like the college professor in life: serious, serene, and seldom joyful. It’s sad really. I would have been such a good little angel.

Why do we die when we get old? The Joey who danced oblivious and wore short red shorts that exposed way too much white leg for a boy of seven, became a teenager who wore preppy clothes and didn’t smile. I envy those who can play with paint and words and sounds. Even my play is serious, serene, and only sometimes comprises any joy.

Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids. What a sad little rabbit I am, but I don’t mind. I like my words and my weird fun which doesn’t make you laugh but has me smiling like a fool. I like the occasional onrush of emotion which I let melt in my mouth like dark chocolate, savoring every second. I can be enthusiastic even with very little sugar added.

My laughter is the wind throwing dry leaves off of desert trees and my dancing is the smell of Arizona rain. My sadness is truer than rain and brighter than gold and it kills and makes you stronger at the same time. I have peace, even in my pacing.

I just want to be a better dancer.

A Really Good Stretch

Okay funny story.

I was up in the foothills of Santa Barbara for the weekend this summer, and I was stretching.  I like to do this Yoga stretch which really works your shoulders and forearms.  It feels delicious.

Does this look like a tree?

1. Just pull one hand up as much as you can
2. Pull the other hand down
3. Try to stretch your shoulders apart from your shoulderblades

And maybe, just maybe, a hummingbird will fly up to you, look you in the eye, and say hi.

Also, it’s a guaranteed stretch to prevent carpal tunnel.

Cursillo

I apologize for not posting on Friday, as I usually do.  I was at a men’s retreat from Thursday night to Sunday.  Here’s a little bit of what happened.

On Saturday morning, I was awoken from my slumber by the sound of singing.  There was a marriachi band of sorts bent on raising us out of sleep as gracefully as possible.  Then dozens of beautiful women walked in to my room giving me flowers and warm embraces, all while I was wearing no clothes.  My favorites were the orange roses, which smelled like Cabernet Sauvignon.  Then they left, as quickly as they had come, and I was left wondering if it was all a dream.

What a strange and wonderful weekend.  If you’ve been on Cursillo, you know what a special group it is.  If you haven’t, you need to go.  I promise you’ll get something special out of it.

Best way to put it, Crusillo is about family.  Find out more here.

Do you know who this is?

POP QUIZ TIME!  I know it’s mean to give quizes on a monday, but I have nothing else to write about…. well, that’s not true.  I just thought you’d enjoy this. 

Here it is.  Can you guess who this pictured person is? 

Hint #1: He was in the news a lot last week.

More hints to follow if you’re struggling.